Walking with the Wise #63: Open and Honest

“The one who conceals hatred has lying lips,

and whoever utters slander is a fool.”
—Proverbs 10:18

One should never be afraid of truth—that is, unless one is choosing to live in a lie. God is truth and we are sanctified by the truth of His Word (John 17:17). And, as lovers of the truth, we must endeavor to speak the truth in love. As Paul wrote,

“Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into Him who is the head, into Christ”—Ephesians 4:15.

The truth that we speak is Christ (John 14:6) and it is through the knowledge of Him that our interactions with men and women have meaning. When we lie, we are giving ourselves over to satanic purposes, for lying is the devil’s modus operandi (John 8:44). Our goal is to love God and our neighbor, making sure that we are on guard against any bitterness that might spring up in our heart (Hebrews 12:15; cf. Ephesians 4:31).

If we fail to admit the real pains and frustrations in our heart with our brother or sister, then we will never be able to move past it. If we have hate in our hearts, then we must admit it, rather than attempt to hide it. Hating our brother is bad enough, but covering up our hate with a lie is adding sin to sin. If we are to be honest with God and ourselves then we must admit to Him our hate in order that the light of His Word might be able to identify it for what it is—sin. And then, as God works within us, we are able to admit it as sin, confess it, receive His forgiveness and move from hate to love as God, by His Spirit, enables us to love the unlovely, just as He loved us when we were His enemies.

If we fail to admit the truth of our heart, then inevitably our hate will come out in other ways much more harmful. We will become slanderous, because we have failed to deal openly and honestly with our heart condition; then it turns into bitterness, and from there seeks harm for the person with whom we are at odds.

Is there someone from whom you have concealed your hatred with lying lips? Are you dealing openly and honestly with your feelings and frustrations? Are you ready to receive God’s perspective on the situation so that you might move from loathing to loving? Go to God, be honest with Him (besides, He knows how you feel anyway), recognize your hate for what it is (it’s sin [cf. Matthew 5:21-22]), and be ready to receive the transforming effects of His love and grace that will enable you to love those whom you find unlovable. God loves us, and He did so even while we were His enemies—and may we, by His all-transforming grace, be merciful and loving to those for whom Christ died, knowing that we are all recipients of something we do not deserve—the gift of God’s Son for our sins. Amen.