Fighting the Flesh #7: Sexual Immorality

“For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God; that no one transgress and wrong his brother in this matter, because the Lord is an avenger in all these things, as we told you beforehand and solemnly warned you.”—1 Thessalonians 3:3-6

We are sexual creatures. God made sex when He said, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed”—Genesis 2:24-25. God made us to come together as “one flesh” in the sexual union, which is a physical and spiritual union that mirrors Christ and His church (cf. Ephesians 5:32). God gave sex for our enjoyment, to foster intimacy between a husband and wife, and for procreation. But, whenever sex occurs outside of the parameters for which he has intended it, destruction, devastation, and pain inevitably occurs. God made the sexual union between a husband and wife to be permanent, positive, and full of pleasure. However, God has set marriage to occur within the realm of holy matrimony and whenever sex occurs outside of that for which God intended it, it becomes dirty, damaging, dishonorable, disturbing, and divisive.

The first step in understanding how to overcome sexual immorality is to know its root. Sexual desires are good, but whenever they seek to occur outside of the parameters of marriage they are sinful. And it is the type of sin that is not just sin against God, but against our own body. As Paul directed,

“Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body”—1 Corinthians 6:18-20.

God has claimed us as His own and paid the price for our sin by giving His life for us so that we might have new life in Him. The first step in overcoming our sexual desires is understanding who we are in Christ. Without understanding who God is and who we are in Him, then we are susceptible to the devil’s lies.

The second step in controlling our sexual desires is to identify the triggers. When does it occur? What day of the week? What time of the day? Is it by myself or with someone else? What emotionally is going on in my life? Mentally? Physically? Spiritually? Relationally? We are spiritual creatures, but we are not only spiritual creatures. We are spiritual creatures with bodies that have hormones, desires, and needs. The spirit and the body are intimately intertwined with each one affecting the other. Sometimes a few things in our life, such as diet, exercise, and other stress relievers can help us deal with our sexual desires.

The third step is learning how to “control [our] own body in holiness and honor.” If we are in Christ, then we have His Spirit in us—the Spirit of “power and love and self-control” (2 Timothy 1:7). We have the ability to control our sexual desires. And sexual desires are usually fueled by the thought life. Refuse to entertain any thought which may lead you down the road of sexual immorality. Take every thought captive!

The fourth step is to understand that we have the grace of God, which has trained us to “renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age”—Titus 2:12. Which is to say, that we have the ability to resist temptation and say, “No” when we are confronted with it. This does not mean that we willingly place ourselves in temptation, but it does mean that if we do find ourselves there, then we can avoid giving into it.

Lastly, we are to run!!!! Get out of there! If you sense your desire overcoming your will then get up and get out! Don’t think about it! Don’t stop and pray about it! Just run! That’s why Paul said that we must “flee sexual immorality” (1 Corinthians 6:18). Joseph didn’t take the time to stop and think about what he was going to do when Potiphar’s wife tried to sleep with him. He got up and ran! (cf. Genesis 39:12).

May I close with this. Sexual sin is very serious, and Christ paid the price for that sin. He wants to set those chained to sexual immorality free. He will free all of those who come to Him in genuine sorrow and sadness of heart (2 Corinthians 7:10) while asking for deliverance and submitting to His Word by appropriating His Spirit and obediently surrendering to Him on a daily basis. We must crucify the flesh (Galatians 2:20) and walk by the Spirit (Galatians 5:16) in the newness of life (Romans 6:4) afforded to us by His Spirit. If we do this, then we will have victory! Amen.