Walking with the Wise #503: Faithful are the Wounds of a Friend

“Faithful are the wounds of a friend;

profuse are the kisses of an enemy.”
—Proverbs 27:6

Friends are people who tell you the truth even when it hurts. Charles Barkley, basketball hall of famer was once asked about his good friend Michael Jordan and how he was doing as an executive with the Charlotte Bobcats. Charles, ever honest, said,

“’I think the biggest problem has been I don't know if he has hired enough people around him who he will listen to,’ Barkley said Thursday on ‘The Waddle & Silvy Show’ on ESPN 1000. ‘One thing about being famous is the people around you, you pay all their bills so they very rarely disagree with you because they want you to pick up the check. They want to fly around on your private jet so they never disagree with you. I don't think Michael has hired enough people around him who will disagree.’"

When Michael was looking to draft Adam Morrison with a very high pick in the 2006 NBA draft, Charles questioned him on his decision:

"I said 'Michael, I think you should take Brandon Roy, and he said “We like Adam Morrison,”’ Barkley said. ‘I said, “Adam Morrison can't play. I said let me ask you a question, did you say Adam Morrison first and [the Bobcats front office staff] agreed with you or did they say Adam Morrison first? He said ‘What do you mean?' I said 'Michael, nobody wants to disagree with you. You are such a powerful personality nobody, especially your flunkies as I call them, the flunkies are never going to disagree with you.' Adam Morrison is a nice kid. He can't play in the NBA."

Charles captured the essence of this proverb. Noticing that Michael had surrounded himself with people who didn’t care about the end result, but only had personal interests in mind, Barkley rightly noted that they would never disagree with him. What Michael needed was someone who cared enough to tell the truth. As the proverb says, “Faithful are the wounds of a friend.” A friend cares enough to tell you the truth because they actually care about you. It’s the enemy who is flattering you so that you might do what they want you to do.

Be a true friend, tell someone the truth, what they need to hear, not what they want to hear. A true friend cares not what they will get; instead they will care about what their friend needs. True Christlikeness means telling someone the truth, even when it hurts. It might wound them in the short term, but in the long term it will help them become the person God desires they be. Amen.