Walking with the Wise #292: Reasoning with Fools

“A fool takes no pleasure in understanding,


but only in expressing his opinion.”
—Proverbs 18:2

A couple of months ago, I conducted a wedding for a wonderful Christian couple. In my message I spoke about what marriage is, how God created it to be, and what was required to make their marriage work. After the wedding, at the reception, as I was just getting ready to leave with my wife, I was approached by a man about my message. He was offended that I talked about marriage being between a man and a woman. He felt that it could be between anybody, but he was specifically referring to it being between two men or two women. I began to share that we all are born dented—in other words, with a predisposition to certain sins. I explained that we all have sinful natures that exhibit themselves in different ways and one of those ways was homosexuality.

Irritated, he said that I was being intolerant. He then proceeded to tell me that homosexuality wasn’t a sin and that there was nothing wrong with two people loving each other and that if God was love, and the two loved each other, then it must be ok. He told me that he and his wife were staunch supporters of gay marriage and homosexual rights. I told him that God is indeed love, but even our desire for love has been corrupted and tries to go outside the bonds within which God ordained it to be. It was just as wrong for two men who struggle with homosexuality to express their love sexually, as it is wrong for a married heterosexual man to have sex with any other woman than his wife, or to indulge in pornography. It didn’t matter what the expression was, if it was not in the context in which God designed it to be—between a husband and a wife in the context of marriage, then it was wrong.

I also said that gay marriage had nothing to do with rights whatsoever, but had to do with moral responsibility and redefining something God has decreed to be inviolable. Frustrated and becoming increasingly incensed at my explanation (not to mention I think he'd had too much to drink), he interrupted me and said that he was so glad that his church accepted homosexuality and that his daughter could grow up and be a pastor of that church (I wanted to tell him that the church he was in was no church at all, because if it doesn’t correctly handle the Word of God, then it is nothing more than a social club). I tried to explain myself further, but he didn’t care about what I had to say anymore. Incensed, he didn’t want to listen to me or even discuss the issue anymore. I offered up my card and he brushed it away, disgusted with me.

We have all been in situations where we had to listen to someone say something stupid. They take a side of an argument, spout what they know about it, and refuse to listen to what others have to say. The Bible is clear that anyone who does that is a fool. Fools don’t care what anybody else thinks—they are the judges and juries in determining what is true. They are close-minded, just as the man with whom I spoke. He had made up his mind that homosexuality was ok, and anything that violated that wouldn’t be tolerated.

Whenever we are confronted by error, we are to lovingly give an answer for the hope that we have in Christ Jesus (1 Peter 3:15). We are to correct our opponents with gentleness and respect, ready to dialogue if they are open to it. We cannot change a person’s mind, but we can reason with them, and testify to the truth of God and His Word. May we live for God’s glory, stand for truth, correct our opponents in a manner becoming to the God who purchased us, and live in such a manner that others may see and wonder at the God whom we serve. Amen.