Bad Company
“’Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company ruins good morals.’"—1 Corinthians 15:33
Relationships are important. After all, right after God created everything and declared them “good” (Genesis 1:4, 10, 12, 18, 21, 25, 31) the first thing He declared “not good” was man being alone (Genesis 2:18). And while marriage is our main aspect of companionship and the foundation of family, it is a modicum of our need of relationships. We are social creatures that need to be with other people—doing life together. Which is why Paul wrote, “Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company ruins good morals.’" Paul desired that we understand the importance of relationships and how those whom we spend time with affect our behavior—for good or bad.
Consider the Proverb, “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another”—Proverbs 27:17. Here, we can see that when we nurture friendships where we are challenged to do and be better, we indeed do and get better. If I am a runner, I want to be around better runners—why? Because I want to be better—I don’t want to run with runners that I can dominate all the time. I want to be challenged, have the best brought out in me and that can only happen when I am running with people that are better than myself. Friendships challenge us to be and do better—to aim for excellence.
Relationships help us in life—to take greater steps of faith, to go deeper in our walk with God, and be of better use for the kingdom of God. But relationships, especially bad relationships can affect us negatively, as Paul warned, “Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company ruins good morals.’" No matter how good our intentions are, or how godly we think we are, if we are continuously spending our time with people to the determent of our walk with Christ, we are in trouble.
Relationships have the power to help us grow in godliness, or to corrupt our character. Consider Psalm 1 for example,
“Blessed is the man
who walks not in the counsel of the wicked,
nor stands in the way of sinners,
nor sits in the seat of scoffers;
but his delight is in the law of the LORD,
and on His law he meditates day and night”—Psalm 1:1-2.
Some believe that the Psalmist is looking at how bad relationships help in the progression of wickedness: walking with the wicked (walks in the counsel of the wicked), leads to doing what they do (stands in the way of sinners), which leads to tearing down others who are doing right (sits in the seat of scoffers).
Undoubtedly, this thought eventually comes to our minds: But what about associating with the lost in order to win them as Jesus exemplified? Didn’t He hang out with the wicked in order to show them His love? Yes, He did. However, there is a subtle, yet very important difference. Their behavior never affected His. He was always the one who affected them. And sinners who encountered Jesus either wanted to know and follow Him, or they were repulsed and turned away from Him.
We must be careful with the friends we have in our lives. There are some friends who help us in our Christian walk and there are others who bring us down. We must carefully evaluate each of our friendships and then discern and decide if it’s best to carry it on. The best way to look at it is this: is this friendship helping me or harming me in my walk with Christ? If someone’s sinful behavior begins to have an affect on me, then I must sever the friendship, no matter how painful. Why? Because their sinful choices lead me to sin—something that God does not desire. This is especially important in the realm of relationships with men and women who consider themselves followers of Christ. If a friend, man or woman, who espouses Christianity maintains and lives in habitual sin, without any sense of remorse or repentance, we must sever the relationship. Which is why Paul wrote so succinctly,
“But now I am writing to you not to associate with anyone who bears the name of brother if he is guilty of sexual immorality or greed, or is an idolater, reviler, drunkard, or swindler—not even to eat with such a one”—1 Corinthians 5:11.
For someone to claim Christ while at the same time condoning sin is antithetical to the Gospel of Jesus Christ. To bear the name “brother” or “sister” means exhibiting the fruit of Christ’s Spirit in our daily lives (cf. Galatians 5:22-23). And while none of us are or will ever be perfect, we know that there will at least be some aspect of His presence in our lives—even when we sin. Or as the church historian Philip Schaff phrased, "To sin, he says, is human, but to persist in sin is devilish; to fall is not ruinous to the soul, but to remain on the ground is." Though sinning is a problem, it is staying in our sin that is far worse.
We must ask for God’s wisdom in assessing our friendships. And if we come to the conclusion, by the Spirit’s guidance, that we need to sever a friendship, we do so carefully and in love to the best of our ability. While, at the same time, asking God to send new friendships our way in order to help sharpen us to be better used for His kingdom. Amen.
Relationships are important. After all, right after God created everything and declared them “good” (Genesis 1:4, 10, 12, 18, 21, 25, 31) the first thing He declared “not good” was man being alone (Genesis 2:18). And while marriage is our main aspect of companionship and the foundation of family, it is a modicum of our need of relationships. We are social creatures that need to be with other people—doing life together. Which is why Paul wrote, “Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company ruins good morals.’" Paul desired that we understand the importance of relationships and how those whom we spend time with affect our behavior—for good or bad.
Consider the Proverb, “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another”—Proverbs 27:17. Here, we can see that when we nurture friendships where we are challenged to do and be better, we indeed do and get better. If I am a runner, I want to be around better runners—why? Because I want to be better—I don’t want to run with runners that I can dominate all the time. I want to be challenged, have the best brought out in me and that can only happen when I am running with people that are better than myself. Friendships challenge us to be and do better—to aim for excellence.
Relationships help us in life—to take greater steps of faith, to go deeper in our walk with God, and be of better use for the kingdom of God. But relationships, especially bad relationships can affect us negatively, as Paul warned, “Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company ruins good morals.’" No matter how good our intentions are, or how godly we think we are, if we are continuously spending our time with people to the determent of our walk with Christ, we are in trouble.
Relationships have the power to help us grow in godliness, or to corrupt our character. Consider Psalm 1 for example,
“Blessed is the man
who walks not in the counsel of the wicked,
nor stands in the way of sinners,
nor sits in the seat of scoffers;
but his delight is in the law of the LORD,
and on His law he meditates day and night”—Psalm 1:1-2.
Some believe that the Psalmist is looking at how bad relationships help in the progression of wickedness: walking with the wicked (walks in the counsel of the wicked), leads to doing what they do (stands in the way of sinners), which leads to tearing down others who are doing right (sits in the seat of scoffers).
Undoubtedly, this thought eventually comes to our minds: But what about associating with the lost in order to win them as Jesus exemplified? Didn’t He hang out with the wicked in order to show them His love? Yes, He did. However, there is a subtle, yet very important difference. Their behavior never affected His. He was always the one who affected them. And sinners who encountered Jesus either wanted to know and follow Him, or they were repulsed and turned away from Him.
We must be careful with the friends we have in our lives. There are some friends who help us in our Christian walk and there are others who bring us down. We must carefully evaluate each of our friendships and then discern and decide if it’s best to carry it on. The best way to look at it is this: is this friendship helping me or harming me in my walk with Christ? If someone’s sinful behavior begins to have an affect on me, then I must sever the friendship, no matter how painful. Why? Because their sinful choices lead me to sin—something that God does not desire. This is especially important in the realm of relationships with men and women who consider themselves followers of Christ. If a friend, man or woman, who espouses Christianity maintains and lives in habitual sin, without any sense of remorse or repentance, we must sever the relationship. Which is why Paul wrote so succinctly,
“But now I am writing to you not to associate with anyone who bears the name of brother if he is guilty of sexual immorality or greed, or is an idolater, reviler, drunkard, or swindler—not even to eat with such a one”—1 Corinthians 5:11.
For someone to claim Christ while at the same time condoning sin is antithetical to the Gospel of Jesus Christ. To bear the name “brother” or “sister” means exhibiting the fruit of Christ’s Spirit in our daily lives (cf. Galatians 5:22-23). And while none of us are or will ever be perfect, we know that there will at least be some aspect of His presence in our lives—even when we sin. Or as the church historian Philip Schaff phrased, "To sin, he says, is human, but to persist in sin is devilish; to fall is not ruinous to the soul, but to remain on the ground is." Though sinning is a problem, it is staying in our sin that is far worse.
We must ask for God’s wisdom in assessing our friendships. And if we come to the conclusion, by the Spirit’s guidance, that we need to sever a friendship, we do so carefully and in love to the best of our ability. While, at the same time, asking God to send new friendships our way in order to help sharpen us to be better used for His kingdom. Amen.
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