Seeking Self(less)

“I have written something to the church, but Diotrephes, who likes to put himself first, does not acknowledge our authority. So if I come, I will bring up what he is doing, talking wicked nonsense against us. And not content with that, he refuses to welcome the brothers, and also stops those who want to and puts them out of the church.”—3 John 1:9-10

When a conductor was asked what was the most difficult chair to fill in his orchestra, he replied, “Second violin. No one wants to be second violin.” No one wants to be second, third or last; we each want to be first. It is ingrained in us to take care of “#1,” and we will do whatever it takes to get ahead in life. We try and push OUR own agendas, OUR wants, and OUR desires, but that’s not what the Bible teaches us. Not everyone can be first, and neither should we always attempt to be so. The Christian life is not about being first, but about being a servant and doing our best. Christ didn’t come in order to make everyone bow down (although ultimately, everyone will)—He came to serve others. As He said,  

“…even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many."—Matthew 20:28.

The question must be asked: Is it okay to be first? To want to be the best? It’s not wrong to be the best at what you do, provided it is to be the best according to your own ability, not so that you will be better than someone else, to use others as a means of boosting your own self-worth and pride. As believers in Christ, we are to make sure that we are following Paul’s admonition and Jesus’ example. As Paul wrote,

“Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though He was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made Himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.”—Philippians 2:3-8

Diotrephes failed to consider others better than himself. He was so concerned with following his own agenda and desires that it spilled over onto others. In our passage for today, we can see that he went so far in his desire to have his own way, that he spoke wickedly about the apostle John and other leaders, and wouldn’t even welcome to the church other brothers and sisters in Christ! And if that weren’t bad enough, he made sure that even those who did welcome the brothers were put out! How much does this contrast with the example of Christ who “made Himself nothing, taking the form of a servant”? Christ is the supreme example that we are to follow. He humbled Himself for others, as should we, whether that be our spouse, a friend, a brother or sister. We should seek not primarily what another person can do for us, but what we can do for them.

May God help us avoid the pitfall of selfishly seeking self as Diotrephes did, and may we sincerely seek to be a selfless servant, just as the Savior did. And may God receive glory because of it. Amen.