Trusting the Ten #7: The Sacred Union

"You shall not commit adultery.”—Exodus 20:14

The first relationship we experience on this earth is with our parents. And one of the first things that we learn is that all of human life is supremely valuable in the sight of God. After these two truths, we learn that we were created as male and female, made to complement one another. As the Scripture says, “So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them”—Genesis 1:27. And because of this complementary nature of our beings, we were made for one another, to come together in the sexual union in the context of marriage:

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh”—Genesis 2:24. 

This union is to be the most sacred of all unions. So much so that in the New Testament, the one-flesh notion of our union with our spouse is comparable to that of Christ and the Church. As Paul says in Ephesians 5:31-32,

"’Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”

The union between a husband and wife is sacred, and to break or pollute that union is to sin not only against God, but against oneself, and invite God’s judgment upon one’s life. As Proverbs 6:32 says, “He who commits adultery lacks sense; he who does it destroys himself.” Or as Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 6:16,  

“Or do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For, as it is written, ‘The two will become one flesh.’" 

Adultery is serious because it pollutes the union that God established to be similar to the union He desires to have with His church. Paul goes on to say,  

“But he who is joined to the Lord becomes one spirit with him. Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body”—1 Corinthians 6:17-18. 

Adultery is sinning against one’s body, which is, according to Scripture, “a temple of the Holy Spirit within you”—1 Corinthians 6:19. Adultery pollutes the marriage union, desecrates our bodies, and invites God’s direct judgment, which is why Jesus speaks not only against adultery, but also the thoughts and actions that lead to it. He says,  

"You have heard that it was said, 'You shall not commit adultery.' But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart”—Matthew 5:27-28.

Adultery does not begin with the sexual act, but with the heart and mind, when one begins to think about, fantasize, and flirt with the idea of indulging in a sinful sexual behavior outside of the marriage union blessed by God. How do we avoid letting anyone come between us and our spouse? Here are three ways:

#1: Take every thought captive (2 Corinthians 10:5). Don’t let the idea of adultery or even the lust of the heart enter your mind. Place a filter on your brain that won’t let any thought of lust take root.

#2. Don’t be proud! Pride lures us into thinking that we are stronger than we really are. It keeps us from “watching and praying” and living in the knowledge that our “spirit is willing but our flesh is weak” (Matthew 26:41). We need to be aware of our sinful desires that Satan will try to use against us and make sure that we are constantly on guard against his schemes and the sinful desires that war within us. And lastly, if you find yourself in temptation:

#3. Flee! Realize that God has provided a way out (1 Corinthians 6:18; 10:13)! You don’t have to do it! God doesn’t want you to sin against Him. He wants you to be obedient and have what’s best for you!

God doesn’t want us to commit adultery. He wants us to treasure the union that we have with our spouse. We need to cultivate that union so that we might experience the reality of the joy that God has for us in marriage. Your marriage might be going through a rocky path right now, but it can be made better! As the Scripture says, “Nothing will be impossible with God”—Luke 1:37. God can transform even the worst marriages for His glory! And He will do it when we continually focus, depend upon, and submit ourselves and our spouses to Him.

May God keep us from adultery and the lust that leads to it. May He enable us to be wives and husbands who honor the Lord with our marriages, and our spouses with the purity and integrity of our lives, and may He receive glory because of it. Amen.