Walking with the Wise #431: Knowing When

“Do not speak in the hearing of a fool,


for he will despise the good sense of your words.”
—Proverbs 23:9

Sometimes I am incredibly naïve. I used to believe that if I just had enough time to reason with a man, I could sway his mind. I don’t think that anymore. Experience has taught me what the Bible has been telling me for years. We can’t convince everybody. We may try to sway them to our opinion to the best of our ability, but until Christ comes, there will always be those whose minds are darkened (cf. Ephesians 4:19) and who are their own gods, unwilling to listen to anyone but themselves. These are ones who will “despise the good sense” of our words and are the same people Jesus was referring to in Matthew 7:6:

“Do not give dogs what is holy, and do not throw your pearls before pigs, lest they trample them underfoot and turn to attack you.”

While we are to share the Gospel (cf. Matthew 28:19-20), giving a reason for the hope that we have (cf. 1 Peter 3:15), making every effort possible to reason with unbelievers (cf. Acts 17:7; 18:4, 19; 19:9; 24:25)—we know that there are times when we are to kick the proverbial “dust off of our feet” (cf. Luke 10:11; Acts 13:51), leaving those with whom we speak to their own sinful devices, praying that God would illuminate their eyes (cf. 2 Corinthians 4:4) and grant them the repentance that leads to life (cf. Acts 11:18). This step should not be taken haphazardly, or indiscriminately, but only after continued or violent rejection, or when their spiritual condition starts affecting our own spiritual walk (cf. 1 Corinthians 15:33). It is then that we have to step away from them, leaving them to the mercy of God.

Because of their rejection, the Bible deems them to be fools (cf. Psalm 14:1; 53:1), and to speak in the hearing of fools is to invite misunderstanding, slander, mocking, scorn, and hate. So then, we must be discerning with respect to how and when we share. There is a time to “keep silence, and a time to speak” (cf. Ecclesiastes 3:7), and we must discern the proper time and place for how and when we share. There is no one-way of doing it. The methods, places, and words are as diverse as the people with whom we are sharing. Of course, we never will be able to discern and speak perfectly, but we trust in the Spirit of God, being acutely attentive to His voice, so that we may be faithful and bold witnesses for the glorious name of Jesus Christ, our Savior and King.